BIPOC working mothers face a unique set of challenges in today’s society. From the impacts of racism and discrimination to the burdens of childcare and household responsibilities, Black and Brown women take on enormous pressure while trying to balance work and family. It’s clear that we need more open discussions and tangible solutions around supporting BIPOC mothers and their wellbeing.
When women of color struggle, their families, communities, workplaces and society as a whole suffer. Maternal health outcomes for Black women are especially alarming – even college educated Black women are more likely to lose their baby than white women without a high school degree. Indigenous women also face incredibly high maternal mortality rates.
The goal is to provide BIPOC mothers with knowledge and tools to better care for themselves and their families.
Navigating the Medical System as a BIPOC Mother
The medical system often fails BIPOC mothers. Black women are 3-4 times more likely to die from pregnancy-related complications than white women in the US. This maternal health crisis stems from systemic racism and bias in healthcare. As a BIPOC mother, navigating the medical system requires being your own advocate. Here are some tips:
Find Culturally Competent Providers
- Search for OBGYNs and pediatricians from your racial/ethnic background. They’re more likely to understand your experience.
- Look for providers who acknowledge racism in healthcare and are actively anti-racist.
- Ask providers directly about their experience treating BIPOC patients. Go with your gut feeling during consultations.
- Get referrals from other BIPOC mothers. Leverage community networks.
Bring an Advocate to Appointments
- Bring your partner, friend or family member to appointments to take notes and ask questions.
- Assign them the role of making sure you are heard and get clarity on next steps.
- Debrief after appointments and have them highlight if any bias occurred.
- Request a visit summary from your healthcare provider that covers any exams, diagnosis, next steps, etc.
Speak Up at Healthcare Appointments
- Come prepared. Write down your symptoms, concerns and questions ahead of time so you don’t forget anything important during the appointment.
- Bring an advocate. Having a trusted friend or relative join you makes it easier to speak up and remember key details. They can take notes and help ensure all your needs are addressed.
- Ask questions. Understanding your diagnosis, treatment options, reasoning behind recommendations, and side effects is vital. Don’t leave until all your questions are answered satisfactorily.
- Voice your preferences. Make your priorities and preferences known, such as natural birth, breastfeeding, or certain medications. Providers can better support you when they understand what matters most to you.
- Request changes. If you want a different provider, second opinion, or alternative treatment, say so. You have a right to request adjustments to your care plan.
- You also have the right to request notes be added to your medical chart.
- You have the right to a second (and third!) opinion.
Consider Alternatives Like Midwives & Doulas
- Midwives provide holistic care and spend more time with mothers.
- Doulas offer labor support and can advocate for you during delivery. It’s shown that access to doula care may lower C-section rates and preterm labor.
Both midwives and doulas empower birthing mothers and provide more personalized care than hospitals. You can look for midwives and doulas from your culture who will understand your experience.
With vigilance and community support, BIPOC mothers can get quality care. But the onus should not be on us alone. Healthcare systems must eradicate racism to truly fix the BIPOC maternal health crisis.
Mental Health Resources
Being a Black or brown mothers, especially a working mother, is like trying to play a rigged game. The system has not been designed to support diverse families and women with unique backgrounds and experiences. Here are some suggestions to ensure you feel supported and heard.
- Find a therapist or support group that understands intersectionality. Look for a POC therapist who can relate to your experience. There are also online forums and groups specifically for BIPOC moms. Consider accessing an Employee Resource Group (ERG) through your employer or your health insurance.
- Make time for daily “me time.” Even 5-10 minutes of deep breathing, meditation, or journaling can help relieve stress and anxiety. Go for a walk, take a bath, or pick up a hobby that brings you joy. Don’t feel guilty about taking time for yourself.
- Reach out when you’re struggling. Confide in trusted friends and relatives who can lend an ear. Set up a weekly vent session or mom meetup. Don’t isolate yourself if you’re feeling depressed or overwhelmed.
- Establish boundaries, for yourself and others. No is a full sentence. That’s it. Say no more often, protect your time.
Remember, your mental health is just as important as your physical health. Ignoring it can lead to burnout and emotional exhaustion over time. You deserve support. Don’t be afraid to ask for it.
Physical Health and Self-Care
Finding time for proper nutrition and exercise can be challenging for busy moms, but taking care of your physical health is crucial. Try to carve out small pockets of time in your day dedicated to movement and healthy eating. Even a 10-15 minute walk can help relieve stress and get your blood flowing. Stock up on easy grab-and-go snacks like fresh fruits, vegetables, nuts and protein bars. Meal prep on your days off so you have healthy recipes ready to heat up on busy nights.
And don’t neglect your basic healthcare needs. We all know that moms put everyone before themselves, but this is a reminder to schedule your annual physical and any recommended health screenings. Your well-being directly impacts your ability to care for your family, so show yourself some love.
Workplace Boundaries
Setting boundaries at work as a working mother is crucial for maintaining work-life balance and preventing burnout.
- Be clear about your availability – communicate what hours you’re able to work, as well as any appointments or commitments outside of work.
- Don’t feel pressured into working overtime or taking on additional duties if you’re unable to. Practice saying “no” politely but firmly.
- If you can, leave work at work. Don’t feel obligated to check emails or be available after hours. Disconnect when you’re done for the day.
- Get creative and suggest win-win solutions – like shorter core hours with earlier or later options. Offer ways you can contribute remotely if needed.
- Normalize parenting. Schedule childcare, pick-ups, drop-offs, etc. in your calendar.
Set your boundaries and advocate for your needs as a working mom. You are entitled to a reasonable work-life balance as much as anyone.
Community & Support Networks
As a BIPOC working mother, surrounding yourself with a strong support system can make a world of difference. Here are some ideas for building your own “village” and finding mentors and peers who understand your experience:
Join In-Person or Online Groups for Minority Moms
- Look on sites like Meetup.com for local in-person groups for moms of color in your area. These groups allow you to connect with other moms going through similar experiences.
- Search Facebook for private online groups specifically for BIPOC moms. These provide a judgment-free space to seek advice, vent, celebrate achievements, and more.
Find Mentors Who Can Relate to Your Experience
- Reach out to women you admire who are also BIPOC working moms. Ask them to grab coffee or have a quick phone call to get their insight.
- At work, seek out senior-level women of color who are mothers. They can provide guidance on navigating the workplace as a minority parent.
- Join a formal mentorship program that matches minority women with mentors of similar backgrounds. These facilitate connections that provide tailored support.
Build Your Own “Village”
- Trade childcare and other support with other moms you trust. Having that backup makes all the difference in managing stress.
- Organize a monthly moms group with BIPOC friends who are parents. Meetings can provide a safe space to open up about shared struggles.
- Don’t be afraid to ask friends and family to chip in with meals, child pickups, errands etc. It takes a village!
Resources
There are many books, podcasts, organizations, and online resources available to support BIPOC working mothers. Here are some recommendations:
Books
- Motherhood So White by Nefertiti Austin. A memoir about the experience of black motherhood and dealing with racism within parenting spaces.
- In My Grandmother’s House: Black Women, Faith, and the Stories We Inherit by Yolanda Pierce.
Podcasts
- The Free Black Women’s Library Podcast: interviews and stories on motherhood, self-care, inner development, and freedom.
- The Parenting Cipher: dedicated to empowering Parents of Color raising special needs kids by demystifying the education system, therapeutic programs, and advocating for the rights of our children.
- Parenting Decolonized: The Parenting Decolonized podcast shines the light on how colonization has impacted the black family structure and what to do about it.
- Black Moms Chat Podcast: created for modern Black moms.
Organizations
- Mamatoto Village: Perinatal and early parenting support for Black families.
